dot hack SWEET N LOW
by Minkachan
Summary: Yeah, so, um, there are a whole lotta sucky .hack mary-sues. So I decided to make fun of 'em. Reviews are appreciated, flames are gracefully accepted.


notes  
  
Okay, there are some pretty bad mary-sues that I've read. They're all very cliché-riddled.  
  
This fic has been made to make fun of them.   
  
So, if I've happened to give a bad review to your mary-sue.... then YES. I AM making fun of you, and flames are gracefully accepted.   
  
Credits for the title and a few ideas go to Puchiko-chan. Go read her fanfiction, it all r0x0rz. =D  
  
end notes   
  
disclaimer  
  
I don't own .hack. Though, I will when Bandai meets my demands....  
  
end disclaimer  
  
.hackSWEETnLOW  
By Andee Lewis  
  
A young Twinblade appeared in front of the Chaos Gate of Mac Anu. He wore mostly red, a color he was told wasn't worn much in "The World." He had pretty blue-green hair, of which alone had many fangirls, especially one named Minka-chan. Alot of readers by now would know that this certain red-wearing, blue-green-haired Twinblade's name was Kite.  
  
Convieniently, Kite really didn't have anything to do that particular day in "The World." As far as he knew none of his friends were online, not even Mia, as strange as that was.   
  
Bored, Kite was. He decided to just hang around Mac Anu and watch, instead of logging off and doing something important. Like homework, feeding his pets, or something else just as equally important.  
  
Suddenly, he felt someone tap his back, which scared the crap out of him IRL and caused him to scream like a little five year-old girl. In the game, he whirled around to see who it was. Standing behind him was a female Heavy Blade character, no taller than he was.   
  
"Hi there! I'm Belladonna! What's your name?" the Heavy Blade said.  
  
She had pretty blue eyes and short silver hair, a couple qualities that Kite, now that he'd seen her, very much liked. Her outfit was similar to Blackrose's in style, but Belladonna's was MUCH more revealing, as if it were too small for her.  
  
"Uhhhh.... I'm Kite." he replied to her, his cheeks turning red. He sounded quite preoccupied, but that was obvious, considering where he was staring.  
  
"I'm a newbie to The World, I only joined the day before yesterday." Belladonna said with a sweet and almost seducing smile. "Would you mind showing me around a little, Kite?"  
  
"Uhhh... alright." Kite replied slowly, not exactly aware of what he was saying.  
  
"Hmm, you sound busy to me. That's okay, you can show me another time. Bye-bye!" With that, she skipped off to the Chaos Gate and dissappeared within three pretty, shiny golden rings.   
  
Kite hadn't heard much of what she said, he had other things on his mind. Things like, "HOLY FRICK SHE'S HOT." After a few minutes of just standing there like a mindless idiot, Kite realized something: He hadn't gotten her member address.  
  
Dissappointed in himself for not asking her for it, he decided to leave. He turned around to face the Chaos Gate, surprised to see Blackrose and Mistral standing there in front of it. They had seen the whole thing.  
  
"Found yourself a girlfriend, huh, Kite?" Blackrose teased him. "I saw you blushing, you know."  
  
"She's not my girlfriend," Kite stated, "and I only met her just now."  
  
"What's her name?" Blackrose curiously asked.   
  
Kite hesitated for a few seconds before he told her. "...Belladonna."  
  
Blackrose snorted. "Belladonna? If that's not a porno name, then I'm the Pope!" she laughed. Mistral looked at her with a puzzled look on her face.  
  
"...You're the Pope?"   
  
"....No. It was just a figure of speech."  
  
"...Oh. Okay then. I was a little scared there, because I accidentally slept in last Sunday and missed church... But it wasn't my fault, I swear!" Mistral said to the light-silvery-pink haired Heavy Blade, who replied with a hopeless sigh.  
  
"Anyways...." Blackrose looked at Kite, and continued, "...did you get her member address?"   
  
Kite shook his head. "No, she left before I could ask for it..."  
  
Mistral patted him on the back. "It's okay, you'll see her again sooner or later!" she assured him cheerfully.  
  
"Hmm... I hope..." Kite said, his voice fading a little. He looked up at his two friends. "Let's just go to a dungeon or something, for now."  
  
Blackrose clapped her hands together. "Great! There's a special event going on right now..."  
  
Beware of the next chapter. >D  
  
Yeah, so as it says above, flames are gracefully accepted. - 


End file.
